I have always loved your hate, Charlie. Partly because it is so different from the way I tend to look at things. (Though I appreciate your backing me when I do write something hate-filled, because I don't consider myself practiced or even good at it, so your approval there, master of it that you are, feels amazing.) Here is one thing I think about a lot and I really believe:
Whatever you focus on grows. And I always remember this related theory that came about when the Loud family was being featured in that incredible documentary series An American Family on TV (don't worry if you have never heard of it - it was in the '70s and predated even my TV watching days). The theory was that things in their lives devolved even more quickly than they would naturally because of the microscope being held over them - with so many people paying attention to the negativity and therefore magnifying it.
So all of this is to say what sounds so stupidly simplistic: You could try ignoring the hateful things and thinking about the great things (like petting the doggies) and see if the hateful things diminish on their own. I get the feeling of responsibility to tackle the actually harmful ones and it's part of what I admire about you, but thinking about them and keeping them in your heart is probably not helping anything and it's potentially hurting your tender-no-matter-how-hard-you-try heart.
Let me know if you hate this.
And thank you for your always thoughtful and interesting takes.
One more thing, Charlie, because you know you and I tend to be long winded: an example of what my friends and I do to not give more power or attention or potentially that human growth factor I talked about to the man that you mentioned a few times in your post is that we never ever ever say or write his name. We used to call him 45 and now we just try to not refer to him as much as possible. I love to feel like he is nothing to us and not worthy of us even uttering those stupid five letters of his last name.
Totally agree … but I’m caught in the middle. If we ignore it will it grow? Or if we name it will it grow? I don’t think I have hate but I have a lot of ANGER. And I am trying my best to focus on very little thing so and micro things that go against the grain. We need you in this fight, Charlie. Please don’t let it drain you. Have you read Trauma Stewardship? It’s on my color coded bookshelf. I can meet you at a dive bar in Chicago and lend / give it to you ….
One more thing Charlie —- and sorry if I took over your comments section (this truly is my happy place don’t tell Jane I said happy place) — I love your Shire. I think you should try to make Shire time daily, maybe even 2x a day. A place you can go and let the hate out. I rage walk and happy dance that’s how I get it out but whatever that is that helps you metabolize that anger, do it more. And please write more here because you’re really an interesting and honest human 🩷
What is actually going on with seed oils btw. Like … I think the anti seed oil people might be in a cult. I am seed oil oblivious . Sensing a trend here ….
Oh thank you so much for indulging my little obsession with how obsessed people have become with seed oils. It's a big RFK Junior thing to get rid of them, but I think it's become unbalanced. I'll tell you more about all of that but here's another question about seed oils. Do you think they call it canola oil instead of rapeseed oil, even though it's rapeseed oil because nobody would want to eat something called rapeseed, or have a bottle of it it on their dinner table?
I don’t eat very many processed foods but I assume they are all bad. Why did seed oil become the catch all? It’s just so weird. Soy, gluten, sugar, dye, fructose, wheat, corn oil …. none of it is good. It’s such a cult.
Thank god someone else hates the Dead. Even as a sort of hippie in the 90's and really high, I just couldn't. I get it was the community that was built around them that was part of their pull but shouldn't the actual music be good?
I have had a ton of rage creep up lately. Even after taking a break from social media, I returned and it's all still the same. Nature is one of my helpful tips too, but now it's summer in the south and going to be 100 degrees next week, and the heat makes me rage even more. Which means maybe I need to get up earlier? Even MORE rage.
I've been trying to go back to things that made me happy as a kid. For me that's reading and watching horror. Trying not to be too hard on myself. That's all we can do.
A few years back I went to Richmond in the summer (stupid move) and like an idiot I thought we could just walk around. The "coldest" day was 102 and I thought I would die. SO I can't imagine living an entire summer like that and I fully understand how that could make you pretty rageful.
I've been trying to read vacuous garbage lately, that's been nice. But I'm going to run out of Jack Reacher books pretty soon at this pace...
What's the best horror movie you've watched lately? I'm always looking for recs
Frewaka was really good folk horror, but I have Irish roots so that interested me. I recently watched Dark Match on The Last Drive-In, and that is my current favorite as far as gore and plot. Canadian wrestlers in the far north battling a demon cult? Yes please.
For the record, The Lost Boys is my comfort watch. But I think that's because I saw it eight times in the theater and there was some sort of sexual awakening happening.
I'm going to check out all of those horror movies. I'm thinking of my favorites too to share. Horror is also a genre where I almost feel like you can't go wrong. I don't think I've ever seen a horror movie that I didn't at least enjoy something about on some level.
And also, you do look like Jerry Garcia now that you point it out…
What the horror movies? I'm not saying I'll watch every single one of them, but I'm gonna look into them. I love horror movies! I also love how I mention a cue about people being argumentative and you just unleash it all, sister. It's the best!
The worst thing a horror movie can be is boring, followed closely by preachy.
There are bad horror movies, but even those will usually have *some* redeeming qualities.
My biggest disappointment lately was "They/Them" (aka They Slash Them), which was a horror comedy about an LGBTQ conversion camp which had a great premise and a fantastic name and ended up being boring and preachy.
Other great stuff:
For non-comedic:
The entire "Fear Street" series on Netflix is great.
Classics like "It Follows", "Jennifer's Body", "X/Pearl/Maxxxine" "The VVitch"- anything with female rage is gonna be worth it.
"Ready of Not" is kind of action-horror, but great.
"Late Night with the Devil" is slow burn creepy horror with David Dastmalchian.
"I Saw The TV Glow" is kind of horror and kind of trippy trans allegory.
"Knock at the Cabin" is a non-horror horror movie.
I love the entire "Insidious" franchise.
Nic Cage in "Longlegs" is one of my absolute favorites, although some people didn't like it. I felt like it absolutely understood horror and was a great new "Silence of the Lambs" type movie.
If you want to go deeper in to "This is weird but also kinda good?" the V/H/S series is all about found footage stuff that is kinda low quality and sometimes gratuitous but also some great concepts.
And then A24 has done a lot of weird horror that is kinda artsy, but still pretty good. ;)
For comedy/horror:
"Happy Death Day" and "Happy Death Day 2 U" are so much fun.
"The Blackening" is a masterpiece. I am white but hang out in Black spaces, so I got like maybe 30% of the jokes and loved it.
"Freaky" is a Freaky Friday horror movie, which is a great premise.
"Cabin in the Woods" is a fantastic horror spoof ala "Scream", not "Scary Movie."
Lots of people do love "Scary Movie" though.
"Tucker and Dale vs Evil" is another horror send up with the inestimable Alan Tudyk which is basically a "What if the bad guys didn't mean to be bad" movie.
I'll stop here since this is not at all the point of the article, but man, do I love horror as an escape, especially in a world that is increasingly horrific.
Companion (Stars one of the actors from Heretic who is great, also Jack Quaid).
The Monkey (So gory, so dumb, so great)
The Substance (other female rage movie, Demi Moore is amazing in it)
Abigail (silly fun in a horror way)
Heart Eyes (A rom-com + horror movie. I loved it. Some people didn't. It's directed by Josh Ruben, who also did Werewolves Within, and is also a hilarious comedian and improviser)
In A Violent Nature (Follows the killer, not the victims. Kinda high concept but I enjoyed it)
I really hope this is not too unpopular. People who think it’s all about love are out of touch with reality! I think loving someone who hates the people you know and love is disloyal. To me, as a Scorpio especially, disloyalty leads to karmic punishment. And deserves plotted revenge!!! The best book I read on this subject is an essay collection edited by Lilly Dancyger called Burn It Down, which revealed anger as a healthy and normal thing. As a teacher of teenagers, I have to teach kids how to engage with anger and not feel ashamed of it because otherwise adults are not being real about what teens feel and teens will not want to deal with those adults. I love AJTP so much for bringing to light so many things that aren’t being touched on in our performative culture!!!
That is absolutely hilarious. I've never thought of it before, but you're right! We do! We also say the word Scorpio with a sense of warning to whoever we're saying it to or a sense of "I know this makes you wary” sometimes even followed by a lie that we are one of the good ones. I'll be in Ben down to quickly point out my Moon sign being in Taurus as a way to soften the blow.
Thank you so much!! As a fellow Scorpio, probably the only people I would say that I actually hate are exactly as you described, the people who hurt people I love – or even people I care about. But as a Scorpio I will always set things right with those people also, no matter how much effort or how long it takes.
I’m very Grateful Dead neutral (but please don’t tell my husband or his friend Pete or Pete’s wife Rebecca or her sister Molly) … that said a lot of “dead heads” annoy me. But mostly bc I loved them at age 14 and they didn’t love me back.
1. My childhood bed. It's seriously too soft. How the fuck did i ever sleep here? My back hurts. But maybe it's due to all the lifting I did yesterday.
2. The plants trying to overtake my childhood home. I know I don't fucking live here and am currently trying to clear what I want before the estate sale but please have some decency for fucks sake.
3. Is it fucks' sake or fuck's sake? Either way. I hate that I am a grammarian about it.
4. I hate being in the south. I had a mid time here growing up.
5. I hate that I have to think about my hunger levels all the time. Dumb body. Feed yourself automatically!
I have always believed it is one fuck in possession of the sake. So, fuck's sake. This may mostly be because I have never had more than a single fuck to give, let alone many fucks so as to necessitate the apostrophe after the S
Perfect reasoning. I will forever write it that way from now on. Mother's Day used to make me crazy but then I learned the origin of it and it makes sense to make that one singular too. Grammar lovers unite!
I hate people who hate the Grateful Dead. I don't like the Grateful Dead's music but they are American icons beloved by millions around the world, promote peace and nonviolence, and until Phish, were the number one global act promoting improvised music. Stupid people hate them.
Perhaps it's the sports brain in me or a general disdain for positivity, but I can't engage with art without hating some of it. It is difficult for me to imagine anything I would enjoy less than listening to an 18-minute breakdown of noodling guitar while a bunch of people twirl around me at a very hot amphitheater. It's not for me. The Wall of Sound was a really cool idea (although I'd argue that using it for the Dead's music is like taking an F1 car out to grab groceries), a lot of the visual art associated with the band is excellent, and they have built a vibrant community that is important to a lot of people (including people I love)... but I absolutely despise the music because I find it to be so very boring. So while I probably have a lot of common ground with Dead fans as far as life goes, I hate the band. But what do I know, I like the most-reviled music of all — ska.
In the fall of 1983, the Rex Foundation was established as a non-profit charitable organization by members of the Grateful Dead and friends. The Rex Foundation enabled the Grateful Dead to go beyond responding to multiple requests for contributions, and proactively provide extensive community support to creative endeavors in the arts, sciences, and education. The first benefit concerts for the Rex Foundation were held in the spring of 1984 at the Marin Veteran’s Memorial Auditorium. Since 1984 the Rex Foundation has granted $8.2 million to some 1,000 recipients. Virtually all grant recipients are selected through the personal knowledge of decision makers – as a result, grant requests are not solicited. Grants are made once or twice a year.
The Rex Foundation has contributed to:
The Achievement Academy at Simon's Recreation Center
The American Indian College Fund
American Music Theater Festival
Bethesda Project (My Brother's House)
Camp Winnarainbow
The Committee for a Better North Philadelphia
Families Against Mandatory Minimums Foundation
The Family Assistance Program
The Farm School
Fishery Foundation of California
Food and Friends
Greater Philadelphia Food Bank
Hanford Education Action League
Huichol Sierra Fund for Community Development
Lithuanian Basketball Team
Mainstream Foundation
Musicians United for Superior Education
National Handicapped Sports
Native American Women's Health Education Center
O'Neill Sea Odyssey
Peer AIDS Education Coalition
The Poetry Project at St. Marks
Project AVARY
San Quentin Mass Choir
Sunburst Projects (Music from people with HIV/AIDS)
Wave Hill - Putting Children in Touch with Nature
Whitechapel Art Gallery, London - John Virtue Exhibition
What a list! Thanks for all this background. Some of these grant recipients I have heard of and most I have not. The Lithuanian basketball team makes me especially gleeful.
I also hate the Dead the most of things I hate. High five.
Hate (other than sartorial) really freaks me out... however I certainly have plenty of RAGE towards those fuckers. You astutely put some words on the Trumpadump situation, and I thank you for that. They say "You gotta name it to tame it" and perhaps naming in great detail what's so fucked about the current regime's behavior at least makes some space in our body for....something else. Refusing to let them make us miserable in every moment seems like a glib answer but the best way my friends and I here in PODUNK FUCKING IOWA handle this unhandleable mess is identifying times we are content and try not to feel guilty about having them. Even if these Republicans evade being pelted by tomatoes every time they wake up.
ASIDE: ...which an Iowan in my town of my aquaintence did...making him a hero in our town forever...its at 0:41 and u can't see anything but they do say he was wearing a "HEIL TRUMPLER" tshirt whilest throwing:
This comment rules! And how did I never know that we could embed video in our comments here? Well, that one was a good one to debut it with for me because I love the tomato and the shirt! Thank you, AJ!
No no she just ha$ a huge platform so I wish she would.Wear that shirt. She went to the rich Catholic high school in Des Moines nobody likes but she has not said any Trump things I bet. Not trying to smack CC
God am I biting my tongue over how much I want to weigh in with my personal feelings about some of the people that you mentioned but I know them in real life and I'm not gonna be stupid and do that here. Let me just say that you are highly justified! And smart! And wise!
OK, I can't remember if I've ever met Dave Matthews but I feel safe enough that he's not close friends with any close friends or anything enough to say I cannot stand that band. The worst! Is that even an unpopular opinion? What's to like?? Ugh!
I’ve literally never heard you say anything bad about anyone except 18 or so years ago when you said basically just that 🤣 Emily accused me of loving them but I just have 2 songs and they are not the popular ones.
True story: I was supposed to be on the boat that got thousands of pounds of Dave Matthew's shit dumped upon it. It was on my birthday, and I was planning on taking that cruise with my parents and my girlfriend. She was running late (as always) and we ended up missing the boat. We were furious at the time, but honestly, this was the best thing she ever did. Although, I would have thoroughly enjoyed suing Dave...
Have I mentioned before that Charlie Connell is my spirit animal? Because Charlie Connell is my spirit animal.
The secret, Charlie, is not to spend less time staring into the void. The secret is to embrace the void. Anything that doesn't actually turn out to be the Worst Case Scenario looks pretty goddamned good by comparison.
Oh god, I'm sorry. My spirit animal is a capybara taking a yuzu bath, it's quite soothing. Definitely much more soothing than *gestures wildly* thiiiiisssss
WTF is a Yuzu Bath (and how do I take one?) I haven’t been this jealous of a Capybara since Kai preferred reading the who would win capybara vs honey badger book over my singing
I don't know what a yuzu bath is either. And my daughter Charlotte was so embarrassed recently when I didn't know what a capybara was. It wasn't a thing when she was little and I would have known about that kind of thing! Sorry!
You are my rage twin, Charlie. I HAAAAAATTTTTTEEEEEEE Fucktard von Clownstick. HATE. H-A-T-E with a deep and unwavering rage that incinerates my reason any time I hear more than two sentences out of his mouth. Add his merry band of morally bankrupt oxygen thieves and I don't understand how I don't spontaneously combust every day. There is a 2 mention limit per person per month of his name in our house; we have a dictionary's worth of pejoratives for him.
Once a month, I send a one word postcard to him.
"RESIGN"
It brings me a moment of joy, especially when I know my FBI file just gets bigger every day. Have fun carrying that thing around, you degenerate maggot spawn. I did it for four years once, so I will do it for another four.
When I feel the flames trying to consume me, I go out to my yard, touch some grass, stomp some ant hills, and feel the sun on my face. I remember that I am everything he hates - Mexican-American daughter of an undocumented migrant, college educated, liberal, well-informed, agnostic, disabled, loud feminist. I hope it burns the lot of them that I am one of MILLIONS just like me.
All this to say, RAGE ON, Charlie. I'm here for it.
This article reminds me of why Foss used to call me Lady Charlie. I miss my rage being directed at things like the windshield wipers being in the middle of the window when the car gets turned off, cartoons that feature both humans and animals talking to each other, laundry, and not being able to drink caffeine.
I find it miserable the world is filled with all this crap. Now I have to listen to some turd swimming, brain half eaten by a worm, drug addict saying I can’t get my kids and myself vaccinated. I can’t shop at my once favorite store because they believed the “go woke, go broke” bs. That I have to watch videos narrated by the very talented Fiona Apple, so I know exactly what to do if one of my neighbors is detained by ICE. Feeling worried about protesting because so many crazy people with guns have more rights than protestors or children in school. It’s a turd fest. Come see us again soon so we can rage harder.
Lady Charlie, I love you. Your rage jumps right off the screen and you're simultaneously screamingly funny. Thank you for being so hilariously combative! We can use your type around here.
My older brother is a deadhead and I worshipped him growing up so I love the Dead, saw them twice before Jerry died which I treasure. By nature I am NOT a hater, I do look for the love in literally EVERYTHING…. But… Maroon 5? The feeling of loathing Adam Levine elicits in me is scorching. HARD PASS. I accept your hate for the Dead though Charlie, you’re YOU and I’m here for it.
I am a lover like you but also completely agree about Adam Levine. I was asked to do a feature on him in Jane magazine before they were known because Maroon 5's first album was called something like Songs About Jane. Now THAT pitch was an easy hard pass! I also don't find him cute - is he supposed to be?
I am here, late, to the comments section to say CHARLIE, set up camp in the shire. It is the only answer. Throw your laptop into the muck and live like the guy in 'The Stranger in the Woods'. Has anyone else here read that book? I fantasize about his life daily. Farewell, everyone, I am going to lug my pop up tent into the backyard and escape reality.
I have always loved your hate, Charlie. Partly because it is so different from the way I tend to look at things. (Though I appreciate your backing me when I do write something hate-filled, because I don't consider myself practiced or even good at it, so your approval there, master of it that you are, feels amazing.) Here is one thing I think about a lot and I really believe:
Whatever you focus on grows. And I always remember this related theory that came about when the Loud family was being featured in that incredible documentary series An American Family on TV (don't worry if you have never heard of it - it was in the '70s and predated even my TV watching days). The theory was that things in their lives devolved even more quickly than they would naturally because of the microscope being held over them - with so many people paying attention to the negativity and therefore magnifying it.
So all of this is to say what sounds so stupidly simplistic: You could try ignoring the hateful things and thinking about the great things (like petting the doggies) and see if the hateful things diminish on their own. I get the feeling of responsibility to tackle the actually harmful ones and it's part of what I admire about you, but thinking about them and keeping them in your heart is probably not helping anything and it's potentially hurting your tender-no-matter-how-hard-you-try heart.
Let me know if you hate this.
And thank you for your always thoughtful and interesting takes.
One more thing, Charlie, because you know you and I tend to be long winded: an example of what my friends and I do to not give more power or attention or potentially that human growth factor I talked about to the man that you mentioned a few times in your post is that we never ever ever say or write his name. We used to call him 45 and now we just try to not refer to him as much as possible. I love to feel like he is nothing to us and not worthy of us even uttering those stupid five letters of his last name.
Totally agree … but I’m caught in the middle. If we ignore it will it grow? Or if we name it will it grow? I don’t think I have hate but I have a lot of ANGER. And I am trying my best to focus on very little thing so and micro things that go against the grain. We need you in this fight, Charlie. Please don’t let it drain you. Have you read Trauma Stewardship? It’s on my color coded bookshelf. I can meet you at a dive bar in Chicago and lend / give it to you ….
I forgot about the color coded shelf, so thank you, I can now return to my roots of getting FURIOUS at something that doesn't matter
I don't hate this... (but don't let anybody know, I have to maintain my ultra-tough exterior!)
😆😆😆
One more thing Charlie —- and sorry if I took over your comments section (this truly is my happy place don’t tell Jane I said happy place) — I love your Shire. I think you should try to make Shire time daily, maybe even 2x a day. A place you can go and let the hate out. I rage walk and happy dance that’s how I get it out but whatever that is that helps you metabolize that anger, do it more. And please write more here because you’re really an interesting and honest human 🩷
What is actually going on with seed oils btw. Like … I think the anti seed oil people might be in a cult. I am seed oil oblivious . Sensing a trend here ….
Oh thank you so much for indulging my little obsession with how obsessed people have become with seed oils. It's a big RFK Junior thing to get rid of them, but I think it's become unbalanced. I'll tell you more about all of that but here's another question about seed oils. Do you think they call it canola oil instead of rapeseed oil, even though it's rapeseed oil because nobody would want to eat something called rapeseed, or have a bottle of it it on their dinner table?
I don’t eat very many processed foods but I assume they are all bad. Why did seed oil become the catch all? It’s just so weird. Soy, gluten, sugar, dye, fructose, wheat, corn oil …. none of it is good. It’s such a cult.
Thank god someone else hates the Dead. Even as a sort of hippie in the 90's and really high, I just couldn't. I get it was the community that was built around them that was part of their pull but shouldn't the actual music be good?
I have had a ton of rage creep up lately. Even after taking a break from social media, I returned and it's all still the same. Nature is one of my helpful tips too, but now it's summer in the south and going to be 100 degrees next week, and the heat makes me rage even more. Which means maybe I need to get up earlier? Even MORE rage.
I've been trying to go back to things that made me happy as a kid. For me that's reading and watching horror. Trying not to be too hard on myself. That's all we can do.
A few years back I went to Richmond in the summer (stupid move) and like an idiot I thought we could just walk around. The "coldest" day was 102 and I thought I would die. SO I can't imagine living an entire summer like that and I fully understand how that could make you pretty rageful.
I've been trying to read vacuous garbage lately, that's been nice. But I'm going to run out of Jack Reacher books pretty soon at this pace...
What's the best horror movie you've watched lately? I'm always looking for recs
Frewaka was really good folk horror, but I have Irish roots so that interested me. I recently watched Dark Match on The Last Drive-In, and that is my current favorite as far as gore and plot. Canadian wrestlers in the far north battling a demon cult? Yes please.
Watching horror! I relaxed just thinking about that. Thanks for that great idea. I'm gonna try that one myself.
For the record, The Lost Boys is my comfort watch. But I think that's because I saw it eight times in the theater and there was some sort of sexual awakening happening.
Genius
The Lost Boys is the best vampire movie ever made (tied with Sinners).
Two Coreys, Jason Patrick, Jamie Gertz, Kiefer, Dianne Weist.
Cry Little Sister is a banger.
And sax man!
I need to see Sinners!!
OMG everyone needs to see Sinners. It's so good.
Do you know what one Deadhead said to the other Deadhead at the Grateful Dead concert, when the drugs wore off?
"Dude. This music really sucks."
Dead. 😆 (head.)
Hahaha
HAHAHA
Seriously. I could never tell which song was being played or when they ended.
I was so messed up when I went to see them that I can't remember if I've seen them once or twice.
The whole reason why the radio show “The Grateful Dead Hour” existed was so they could play ONE song on the radio.
I look very similar to Jerry Garcia so I hate the Dead simply because of the number of “Hey did you know you look like Jerry Garcia?” I’ve heard.
I also love really loud metal to fix the rage (or get it out).
And horror, 100%.
Recent greats:
Sinners. Just so good.
Talk to Me and She Came Back. Terrifying.
I watched the entire final destination series which was also incredibly stupid and fun.
And then reading pretty much anything by Stephen Graham Jones.
I'm going to check out all of those horror movies. I'm thinking of my favorites too to share. Horror is also a genre where I almost feel like you can't go wrong. I don't think I've ever seen a horror movie that I didn't at least enjoy something about on some level.
And also, you do look like Jerry Garcia now that you point it out…
You are??! Really??
What the horror movies? I'm not saying I'll watch every single one of them, but I'm gonna look into them. I love horror movies! I also love how I mention a cue about people being argumentative and you just unleash it all, sister. It's the best!
The worst thing a horror movie can be is boring, followed closely by preachy.
There are bad horror movies, but even those will usually have *some* redeeming qualities.
My biggest disappointment lately was "They/Them" (aka They Slash Them), which was a horror comedy about an LGBTQ conversion camp which had a great premise and a fantastic name and ended up being boring and preachy.
Other great stuff:
For non-comedic:
The entire "Fear Street" series on Netflix is great.
Classics like "It Follows", "Jennifer's Body", "X/Pearl/Maxxxine" "The VVitch"- anything with female rage is gonna be worth it.
"Ready of Not" is kind of action-horror, but great.
"Late Night with the Devil" is slow burn creepy horror with David Dastmalchian.
"I Saw The TV Glow" is kind of horror and kind of trippy trans allegory.
"Knock at the Cabin" is a non-horror horror movie.
I love the entire "Insidious" franchise.
Nic Cage in "Longlegs" is one of my absolute favorites, although some people didn't like it. I felt like it absolutely understood horror and was a great new "Silence of the Lambs" type movie.
If you want to go deeper in to "This is weird but also kinda good?" the V/H/S series is all about found footage stuff that is kinda low quality and sometimes gratuitous but also some great concepts.
And then A24 has done a lot of weird horror that is kinda artsy, but still pretty good. ;)
For comedy/horror:
"Happy Death Day" and "Happy Death Day 2 U" are so much fun.
"The Blackening" is a masterpiece. I am white but hang out in Black spaces, so I got like maybe 30% of the jokes and loved it.
"Freaky" is a Freaky Friday horror movie, which is a great premise.
"Cabin in the Woods" is a fantastic horror spoof ala "Scream", not "Scary Movie."
Lots of people do love "Scary Movie" though.
"Tucker and Dale vs Evil" is another horror send up with the inestimable Alan Tudyk which is basically a "What if the bad guys didn't mean to be bad" movie.
I'll stop here since this is not at all the point of the article, but man, do I love horror as an escape, especially in a world that is increasingly horrific.
Okay a couple more recent ones:
Heretic (Hugh Grant is the worst in this movie)
Companion (Stars one of the actors from Heretic who is great, also Jack Quaid).
The Monkey (So gory, so dumb, so great)
The Substance (other female rage movie, Demi Moore is amazing in it)
Abigail (silly fun in a horror way)
Heart Eyes (A rom-com + horror movie. I loved it. Some people didn't. It's directed by Josh Ruben, who also did Werewolves Within, and is also a hilarious comedian and improviser)
In A Violent Nature (Follows the killer, not the victims. Kinda high concept but I enjoyed it)
Mr. Crocket (Underrated Black horror, imho).
I really hope this is not too unpopular. People who think it’s all about love are out of touch with reality! I think loving someone who hates the people you know and love is disloyal. To me, as a Scorpio especially, disloyalty leads to karmic punishment. And deserves plotted revenge!!! The best book I read on this subject is an essay collection edited by Lilly Dancyger called Burn It Down, which revealed anger as a healthy and normal thing. As a teacher of teenagers, I have to teach kids how to engage with anger and not feel ashamed of it because otherwise adults are not being real about what teens feel and teens will not want to deal with those adults. I love AJTP so much for bringing to light so many things that aren’t being touched on in our performative culture!!!
Scorpios really do drop “as a scorpio” more than any other sign😆😆😆 (and I loooooove them
for it)
That is absolutely hilarious. I've never thought of it before, but you're right! We do! We also say the word Scorpio with a sense of warning to whoever we're saying it to or a sense of "I know this makes you wary” sometimes even followed by a lie that we are one of the good ones. I'll be in Ben down to quickly point out my Moon sign being in Taurus as a way to soften the blow.
”
Yes, people need a WARNING that they are dealing with a scorpio!!!
Thank you so much!! As a fellow Scorpio, probably the only people I would say that I actually hate are exactly as you described, the people who hurt people I love – or even people I care about. But as a Scorpio I will always set things right with those people also, no matter how much effort or how long it takes.
I’m very Grateful Dead neutral (but please don’t tell my husband or his friend Pete or Pete’s wife Rebecca or her sister Molly) … that said a lot of “dead heads” annoy me. But mostly bc I loved them at age 14 and they didn’t love me back.
Today I am too tired to hate (beside the obvious). Ask me tomorrow and I will probably have a list.
Come back tomorrow well rested with hate in your heart! And I love that you say besides the obvious. Perfect use of dismissiveness versus aggression.
Okay, I am semi-well rested.
And here is my current hate list:
1. My childhood bed. It's seriously too soft. How the fuck did i ever sleep here? My back hurts. But maybe it's due to all the lifting I did yesterday.
2. The plants trying to overtake my childhood home. I know I don't fucking live here and am currently trying to clear what I want before the estate sale but please have some decency for fucks sake.
3. Is it fucks' sake or fuck's sake? Either way. I hate that I am a grammarian about it.
4. I hate being in the south. I had a mid time here growing up.
5. I hate that I have to think about my hunger levels all the time. Dumb body. Feed yourself automatically!
That's what I have at this hour.
I have always believed it is one fuck in possession of the sake. So, fuck's sake. This may mostly be because I have never had more than a single fuck to give, let alone many fucks so as to necessitate the apostrophe after the S
That makes perfect sense.
Perfect reasoning. I will forever write it that way from now on. Mother's Day used to make me crazy but then I learned the origin of it and it makes sense to make that one singular too. Grammar lovers unite!
This list is glorious. Where in the south (again)? I'm from Durham, NC and feel heeby jeebies when I am back there.
Outside of Charleston, WV. I can hear the accent in my voice right now. 🙃
I can sure hear it too. Give me a couple of drinks and mine will come roaring back. I love a southern accent though.
I hate people who hate the Grateful Dead. I don't like the Grateful Dead's music but they are American icons beloved by millions around the world, promote peace and nonviolence, and until Phish, were the number one global act promoting improvised music. Stupid people hate them.
Now THIS is what I've been asking for! Let's argue! Thanks Tom!!
I am probably a "Fair Weather Dead Head" It's a real conundrum because I LOVE SO MANY SONGS and I have tattoos and albums, BUT
If I ever had to sit through an actual concert with "jamming" and "improvisation" HARD PASS
I’m team Katie
OK, so does that mean you are also team Tom?
Thank you! Fight fight fight!
Is this an Unpopular Opinion? Lol
Perhaps it's the sports brain in me or a general disdain for positivity, but I can't engage with art without hating some of it. It is difficult for me to imagine anything I would enjoy less than listening to an 18-minute breakdown of noodling guitar while a bunch of people twirl around me at a very hot amphitheater. It's not for me. The Wall of Sound was a really cool idea (although I'd argue that using it for the Dead's music is like taking an F1 car out to grab groceries), a lot of the visual art associated with the band is excellent, and they have built a vibrant community that is important to a lot of people (including people I love)... but I absolutely despise the music because I find it to be so very boring. So while I probably have a lot of common ground with Dead fans as far as life goes, I hate the band. But what do I know, I like the most-reviled music of all — ska.
So you’re saying they’re goddamn hippies who can’t remember their music and play bad versions of jazz?
Ha ha ha. I look forward to this response…
In the fall of 1983, the Rex Foundation was established as a non-profit charitable organization by members of the Grateful Dead and friends. The Rex Foundation enabled the Grateful Dead to go beyond responding to multiple requests for contributions, and proactively provide extensive community support to creative endeavors in the arts, sciences, and education. The first benefit concerts for the Rex Foundation were held in the spring of 1984 at the Marin Veteran’s Memorial Auditorium. Since 1984 the Rex Foundation has granted $8.2 million to some 1,000 recipients. Virtually all grant recipients are selected through the personal knowledge of decision makers – as a result, grant requests are not solicited. Grants are made once or twice a year.
The Rex Foundation has contributed to:
The Achievement Academy at Simon's Recreation Center
The American Indian College Fund
American Music Theater Festival
Bethesda Project (My Brother's House)
Camp Winnarainbow
The Committee for a Better North Philadelphia
Families Against Mandatory Minimums Foundation
The Family Assistance Program
The Farm School
Fishery Foundation of California
Food and Friends
Greater Philadelphia Food Bank
Hanford Education Action League
Huichol Sierra Fund for Community Development
Lithuanian Basketball Team
Mainstream Foundation
Musicians United for Superior Education
National Handicapped Sports
Native American Women's Health Education Center
O'Neill Sea Odyssey
Peer AIDS Education Coalition
The Poetry Project at St. Marks
Project AVARY
San Quentin Mass Choir
Sunburst Projects (Music from people with HIV/AIDS)
Wave Hill - Putting Children in Touch with Nature
Whitechapel Art Gallery, London - John Virtue Exhibition
United Indians of All Tribes Foundation
Zen Hospice Project
and many others.
Now this I can get behind. A half hour of drums/space, no thank you
What a list! Thanks for all this background. Some of these grant recipients I have heard of and most I have not. The Lithuanian basketball team makes me especially gleeful.
I also hate the Dead the most of things I hate. High five.
Hate (other than sartorial) really freaks me out... however I certainly have plenty of RAGE towards those fuckers. You astutely put some words on the Trumpadump situation, and I thank you for that. They say "You gotta name it to tame it" and perhaps naming in great detail what's so fucked about the current regime's behavior at least makes some space in our body for....something else. Refusing to let them make us miserable in every moment seems like a glib answer but the best way my friends and I here in PODUNK FUCKING IOWA handle this unhandleable mess is identifying times we are content and try not to feel guilty about having them. Even if these Republicans evade being pelted by tomatoes every time they wake up.
ASIDE: ...which an Iowan in my town of my aquaintence did...making him a hero in our town forever...its at 0:41 and u can't see anything but they do say he was wearing a "HEIL TRUMPLER" tshirt whilest throwing:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8gnmFSLZmcg
This comment rules! And how did I never know that we could embed video in our comments here? Well, that one was a good one to debut it with for me because I love the tomato and the shirt! Thank you, AJ!
His 15 min of of fame rival Caitlin Clark for Iowa Shitty’s most important figure. it would be awesome if she wore a HEIL TRUMPLER shirt out walking around….. ( IA joke iykyk) https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/stephaniemcneal/andrew-alemao-tomato-thrower
Oh you didn’t just smack down CC … wait she’s not a trumper right??
Trumpet took me a sec but it was a fun sec!
🤣🤣🤣 my phone hates me. I don’t care if she’s a trumpet! She better not be a 45 fan
Well said! And good timing, as I'm hearing the latest news about 45’s doings right now. Ugh.
No no she just ha$ a huge platform so I wish she would.Wear that shirt. She went to the rich Catholic high school in Des Moines nobody likes but she has not said any Trump things I bet. Not trying to smack CC
Got it. And I love all the back-and-forth in this conversation. Just like an actual conversation!
I also hate the Dead. And Sting. And I (used to, not so much these days) play bass!
God am I biting my tongue over how much I want to weigh in with my personal feelings about some of the people that you mentioned but I know them in real life and I'm not gonna be stupid and do that here. Let me just say that you are highly justified! And smart! And wise!
I would love to get Jane’s unpopular opinion about the Dave Matthew’s band 😆
OK, I can't remember if I've ever met Dave Matthews but I feel safe enough that he's not close friends with any close friends or anything enough to say I cannot stand that band. The worst! Is that even an unpopular opinion? What's to like?? Ugh!
I’ve literally never heard you say anything bad about anyone except 18 or so years ago when you said basically just that 🤣 Emily accused me of loving them but I just have 2 songs and they are not the popular ones.
Oh my God, I didn't remember that, but thank you for reminding me so that I can taunt you about it again now. Yay!
Also, 18 years? What the fuck?!
True story: I was supposed to be on the boat that got thousands of pounds of Dave Matthew's shit dumped upon it. It was on my birthday, and I was planning on taking that cruise with my parents and my girlfriend. She was running late (as always) and we ended up missing the boat. We were furious at the time, but honestly, this was the best thing she ever did. Although, I would have thoroughly enjoyed suing Dave...
Also, I made a joke about groups of women who hate Sting in this thing I wrote: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/names-for-different-groups-of-women
I mean, to be fair, I have never met him in person. I just hate his music, haha.
Hell yeah!
Hell yes Sting's music sucks. Also Jack Johnson.
Have I mentioned before that Charlie Connell is my spirit animal? Because Charlie Connell is my spirit animal.
The secret, Charlie, is not to spend less time staring into the void. The secret is to embrace the void. Anything that doesn't actually turn out to be the Worst Case Scenario looks pretty goddamned good by comparison.
Oh god, I'm sorry. My spirit animal is a capybara taking a yuzu bath, it's quite soothing. Definitely much more soothing than *gestures wildly* thiiiiisssss
WTF is a Yuzu Bath (and how do I take one?) I haven’t been this jealous of a Capybara since Kai preferred reading the who would win capybara vs honey badger book over my singing
I don't know what a yuzu bath is either. And my daughter Charlotte was so embarrassed recently when I didn't know what a capybara was. It wasn't a thing when she was little and I would have known about that kind of thing! Sorry!
Click this link. You will not regret it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QUqCWkPlLLc
I want to go to there.
Wait, they're big!
You two! (Are brilliant.)
You are my rage twin, Charlie. I HAAAAAATTTTTTEEEEEEE Fucktard von Clownstick. HATE. H-A-T-E with a deep and unwavering rage that incinerates my reason any time I hear more than two sentences out of his mouth. Add his merry band of morally bankrupt oxygen thieves and I don't understand how I don't spontaneously combust every day. There is a 2 mention limit per person per month of his name in our house; we have a dictionary's worth of pejoratives for him.
Once a month, I send a one word postcard to him.
"RESIGN"
It brings me a moment of joy, especially when I know my FBI file just gets bigger every day. Have fun carrying that thing around, you degenerate maggot spawn. I did it for four years once, so I will do it for another four.
When I feel the flames trying to consume me, I go out to my yard, touch some grass, stomp some ant hills, and feel the sun on my face. I remember that I am everything he hates - Mexican-American daughter of an undocumented migrant, college educated, liberal, well-informed, agnostic, disabled, loud feminist. I hope it burns the lot of them that I am one of MILLIONS just like me.
All this to say, RAGE ON, Charlie. I'm here for it.
👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
This article reminds me of why Foss used to call me Lady Charlie. I miss my rage being directed at things like the windshield wipers being in the middle of the window when the car gets turned off, cartoons that feature both humans and animals talking to each other, laundry, and not being able to drink caffeine.
I find it miserable the world is filled with all this crap. Now I have to listen to some turd swimming, brain half eaten by a worm, drug addict saying I can’t get my kids and myself vaccinated. I can’t shop at my once favorite store because they believed the “go woke, go broke” bs. That I have to watch videos narrated by the very talented Fiona Apple, so I know exactly what to do if one of my neighbors is detained by ICE. Feeling worried about protesting because so many crazy people with guns have more rights than protestors or children in school. It’s a turd fest. Come see us again soon so we can rage harder.
Lady Charlie, I love you. Your rage jumps right off the screen and you're simultaneously screamingly funny. Thank you for being so hilariously combative! We can use your type around here.
My older brother is a deadhead and I worshipped him growing up so I love the Dead, saw them twice before Jerry died which I treasure. By nature I am NOT a hater, I do look for the love in literally EVERYTHING…. But… Maroon 5? The feeling of loathing Adam Levine elicits in me is scorching. HARD PASS. I accept your hate for the Dead though Charlie, you’re YOU and I’m here for it.
I am a lover like you but also completely agree about Adam Levine. I was asked to do a feature on him in Jane magazine before they were known because Maroon 5's first album was called something like Songs About Jane. Now THAT pitch was an easy hard pass! I also don't find him cute - is he supposed to be?
I think he is “supposed to be” which may be the root of my visceral recoil.
I am here, late, to the comments section to say CHARLIE, set up camp in the shire. It is the only answer. Throw your laptop into the muck and live like the guy in 'The Stranger in the Woods'. Has anyone else here read that book? I fantasize about his life daily. Farewell, everyone, I am going to lug my pop up tent into the backyard and escape reality.